Get Back Up!

I remember the first portrait I ever drew. I had no idea what I was doing. I knew drawing people would be hard. Well, drawing people isn't necessarily difficult, but making the drawing resemble a specific person is. Before I started, I told myself something. I said, "drawing people is not my specialty, but I'm going to make it my specialty." I said it jokingly then, however it is a specialty of mine now. And it's something I really enjoy. But that doesn't mean I became good at at it overnight.

I often get bogged down when life throws me a curve ball or when I've tried everything and nothing goes right. I find myself playing the comparison game. Man, I wish I was super spiritual like that guy, or I wish I was more organized and could accomplish as much as that girl, or if only I was a little taller, or more outgoing, or well, you get the picture. Earlier today I got to thinking: what am I doing with my life? It seems as though I do a whole lot of nothing most of the time. I might work on a drawing for a while, or do some homework, or chores, or something, but it seems like the people around me get so much more done than I could ever hope to accomplish. So when life gets hard, I feel like quitting. But let me tell you something else: I'm no quitter.

I've got another story to tell you. I went roller skating about a week ago with some friends. None of us were phenomenal skaters. However, I felt like I was the worst. I fell down more than anyone else. In fact, my tailbone is still sore. It was embarrassing to watch all of those people skate circles around me. There were 8, 10, 12 year olds who could zoom around the rink better than I could. And it seemed like my friends all made more progress than I did and I never saw them fall on their butts. Now, I already knew I was a terrible skater. I had accepted that. And I wasn't mad at anyone. It just seemed like I found something else I was no good at and everyone else could see that. I'm sure those young kids thought I looked like a doofus wobbling around out there. (I know I felt like a doofus) But to me, it didn't matter what all of those people thought. Every time I fell, I painfully and awkwardly got back to my feet and tried again. I didn't think about it then, but today I realized an important lesson. But, there's a little more story to tell before I get there.

My mom happened to find a pair of skates lying around the house a couple of days ago. (Coincidence? I think not). The best part? They're vintage skates from like the 70's! (So cool!!!) So after watching 12 year olds skate circles around me last week and spending half the time falling down, I was determined to do better. I cleaned up the garage a bit, laced up the skates, put my game face on, and got after it. Sure, I fell... a lot, but by the end of the afternoon I could maneuver around without thinking too much, I could turn, and I could sorta stop. I made progress.

You see, when my mom found the skates, I saw it as an opportunity to put a life lesson into action: if you fall down 100 times, get up 101 times. It's not easy and sometimes it hurts, but it's worth it. If you can't tell, I'm not just talking about roller skating. I'm talking about life. In today's world, we want things and we want them now. We don't have patience. So when things move too slowly, or if things get too hard, it's often easier to quit. That describes me to the letter. Or, it did anyway. I realize that God made me the way I am for a reason. So sure, there will always be someone out there who can do something better than me, but God didn't call me to be like that person. He called me to be like His Son, Jesus Christ; I am to follow His example, not anyone else's. God doesn't judge me by how well I measure up to the ability of others. He judges me by His standards. Did I do the best I could? Did I do what God asked ME to do? Is MY heart in tune with God's? I am His and I need to live like He is enough - because He is.

"Now we know that God’s judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. God will repay each person according to what they have done. To those who by persistence in doing good seek glory, honor and immortality,he will give eternal life. But for those who are self-seeking and who reject the truth and follow evil, there will be wrath and anger. There will be trouble and distress for every human being who does evil: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile; but glory, honor and peace for everyone who does good: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile. For there is no respect of persons with God."
Romans 2:2,6-11

I'll go back to where I started this post.
Drawing portraits is still a challenge. I do alright, but I'm always striving to improve, to do better. If someone were to ask me what drawing was my favorite, I would give them the same answer as Carroll Shelby: The next one! Sure, I've done some pretty cool pieces, but whenever I get an opportunity to do a new picture, I relish it. I look at it as a chance to learn, a chance to improve, a chance to forget past mistakes and try again.

If you don't get anything else out of what I've said, get this: You can never learn and you will never grow if you fall down but don't get back up.

I've been there. I know.

A special thanks to my friends who invited me to go roller skating. I may never have realized these things had it not been for all the times I fell and bruised my butt ;)